I'm so sorry that I haven't been blogging lately. I've been finding myself in a bit of a funk lately and being as I try to convey positivity and good feelings on here, I thought it would be best that I stay away for awhile. But I had an epiphany in the shower this evening/morning. Nobody really expects me to be happy all the time. People's lives are full of high and lows, it makes us human and keeps us grounded.
So, I have a question for you guys. I wanted to reserve asking questions until I built a bigger following being as I'd hate to look like a looser if I didn't receive any responses, but I'll try to keep my big boy pants on and a box of tissues on hand. So here's the question: Do you think that there is someone out there for everyone? Or are there only others out there for some, while the rest of us are left collecting up friends to feel complete?
Kinda deep and dark I know but it's a very real mental mind fuck that many people torture themselves with daily, myself included. I've make the decision that relationships are difficult, they take a lot of time and a lot of work and usually end in heartbreak. With this in mind, it seemed only healthy not to concentrate on searching out such things and instead concentrating my efforts on school and further myself as a person. So, after putting this mindset into action, I find that my social needs aren't being met. What is wrong with me?
So, I begin scouring gay social networking sites, looking to build new friendships with people like me. Problem is this: The people that I find to be genuinely awesome people that I would like to build a friendship with are looking for love or sex. The people who are looking for friendships share no common interests. Couple this with the fact that my college career seems to be going down the tubes at a rapid rate and the result is Sad Matt. The only way I know how to deal with sadness is to throw anger at it... thus, we have Mad Matt.